Bummer!

Back when everything was sound, I used to run around; I could jog a few miles with ease.
I could scamper up a tree like the squirrels I see and four flights of stairs were a breeze.
I’d laugh and I’d climb, taking two at a time; I was strong; I was spry; I was fast!
I could conquer any hill, hop a fence at will, but now that’s all in the past.

Cause, my status keeps slippin’ from quo: I thought I’d linger longer, but no—
And it’s clear as can be, just take it from me: It’s a bummer when your body starts to go!
I take a pill with my tea for my degenerate knee to help my cartilage grow
And it’s sad but true: I take another one too to keep my cholesterol low.
I’ve got a cushion in my seat to keep my back pain beat & wedges in the heels of my shoes;
I have to get up to pee every morning at three and I need my afternoon snooze.

And if that’s not enough, I tore my rotator cuff and the fix laid me up for a week.
I couldn’t raise my arm without doing more harm and I couldn’t get an hour of sleep.
Now my cataracts, they get darker by the day so signs are gettin’ harder to see.
I guess I’m past my prime and—oh, no! It’s time for another colonoscopy!

Now, I’m telling you, friend, it’ll get you in the end, so run, jump, and play while you can
And show your gratitude, too, for all you can do before you need a medical plan.
Take the stairs, ride a bike, take a swim, take a hike,
‘Cause you haven’t got forever, you know,
And before too long you’ll be singin’ this song: It’s a bummer when your body starts to go!

Now, my hair’s getting’ thin; I’ve got spots in my skin; my dermatologist’s startin’ to frown.
It’s comin’ down to the wire. Do all the Fates conspire to drag this poor boy down?
Prescription drugs are cuttin’ into my sex life, but that’s the least of my worries, I know:
I think I’d better set my sights on my next life, ’cause this old body is a-startin’ to go!
Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m just singin’ this song and tryin’ to get a smile or two;
It’s really not so bad—all the friends I’ve had, and now I’m a grandfather, too!
It’s still a wonderful life, I’ve got a wonderful wife, and our love will see us through;        and I can still drive my car and play my guitar, and I can sing this song for you!

But my status keeps slippin’ from quo: I thought I’d linger longer, but there I go—
And it’s clear as can be, just take it from me: It’s a bummer when your body starts to go!

[Bummer, Copyright 2013-2018, Gary D. Bolstad / Krikit Music]

About krikitarts

Welcome to Krikit Arts! I'm a veterinarian; photographer; finger-style guitarist, composer, instructor, and singer/songwriter; fisherman; and fly-tyer. Please enjoy--and please respect my full rights to all photos on this Website!
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34 Responses to Bummer!

  1. Margaret. Anne Temby says:

    Oh Cuz you made my day. I especially love the “ Hippie pic” in Europe somewhere. Do you still gather with your recording group? Love this!🤟

    • krikitarts says:

      I’ve been back in Berlin several times, but I’m sorry to say that I’ve lost touch with the others. I’ve tried to pick up the threads, but they have rather common names, and I’ve been unable to hunt them down. I keep hoping that they’ll google me some day, as mine is rather unique.

  2. Peter Klopp says:

    What a coincidence! You are singing my song. Best wishes! Peter

    • krikitarts says:

      It’s nice to have coincidence augment the friendship factor. As entropy sets in for us all, it’s not surprising that similar things enter our various inner circles. Or, rather, maelstroms.

  3. Vicki says:

    Ditto to all that, Gary :D Love the song and great photos from the past. Great shot of your music group.

    You make me feel so much better with all my chronic health probs LOL.
    …….and why did I inherit all the heart & health conditions from both sides of my family, as well as my own health issues? Talk about bad luck.

    At least we can still get out of bed in the morning :).

    • krikitarts says:

      Yes, that is still yet another reason to be thankful. On the other hand, it’s comforting to know that, when that facility passes, there are still opportunities for artistic expression, and I plan to hold on to them as long as possible!

  4. Ms. Liz says:

    Hahaha! Lots of smiles Gary :) x5

  5. shoreacres says:

    But we need to know the tune! Clearly, it has to be a bouncy one — no dirges for us, yet.

    Actually, the lyrics come close to fitting the tune of Phil Ochs’ “Draft Dodger Rag.” When I got to “Now, my hair’s getting’ thin; I’ve got spots in my skin…” I was reminded of “Sarge, I’m only eighteen, I got a ruptured spleen…” Ah, memories — and some real laughs from your lyrics. Great photos, too — what’s that car?

    • krikitarts says:

      Yep, I know it well, and through all these years, I’ve thought that Tom Paxton wrote it! Thanks for the great feedback, Linda! The car was my first as a student in Berlin, and it was a Simca Aronde, which–if my memory serves–was about 20 years old when I bought it for around $150 during student days in Berlin, probably in 1969 or so. As for the tune, I’ll see what I can do…

    • I once got to hear Phil Ochs live at Columbia in 1966 or ’67. It’s a shame he committed suicide a decade later.

  6. It happens to us all…… but fun whilst it lasts :-)

    • krikitarts says:

      I dare say that fun is relative. There are still things that one can do that are fun, but there are also many that used to be fun but are no longer on the plate of the possible. And yes, one must savor the former and not overly lament the latter.

  7. That car is awesome! So is the guy standing nearby and family. It appears from all the comments that you are not alone in singing this tune. As you might imagine, were I not already humming your ditty I am after yesterday. :-) As much as I am not enjoying the changes we go through, most of us are lucky to be experiencing them compared to the alternative. Doesn’t make it any more fun though. ;-)

    • krikitarts says:

      Yeah, that car was something else. The driver’s windshield wiper fell off, the driver’s seat wasn’t adequately bolted to the floor and tended to tip over backward, and the brakes weren’t dependable. But, somehow, it got us where we needed to go, until I scrapped it for my first beetle. And the girls in the first photo weren’t actually family, but rather best friends of my then-wife-to-be. Very glad that you like the song, and I’ll try to send you the tune so that you can hum it the way it was meant to be. I love it when folks hum my tunes!

  8. I did have the colonoscopy ready to go but I got ill so it is on the shelf for now, especially with Covid-19 stalking the planet. I know what you mean about age and the ailments that come with it, and the pills. A few lyrics of mutual understanding Great photos blast from the past, Gary, and very wise words to the young.

  9. You’ve been hiding your songwriting talent from us! I’m impressed. The subject comes close to home.

    • krikitarts says:

      Why, thank you, kind Sir! Maybe I’ll have to consider sharing a few more. I think I tried to include a music clip at some point in the past, but I seem to remember that my version of WordPress wouldn’t let me.

      • Yesterday I went to include a .mov file in a forthcoming post and I found I’d have to update to a premium account for that common kind of movie file to be accepted.

  10. By the way, I had an old white Simca in NY in 1970–71 and it was junky.

  11. Adrian Lewis says:

    Gary, this is wonderful, I can identify with so much of it! :) :) :)

  12. bluebrightly says:

    Tellin’ it like it is…to a very appreciative audience. :-)

    • krikitarts says:

      Since I completed it in its present form, more has happened that could result in an extra verse or two, but I think I’ll just let this snoozing puppy lie. On the other hand, there may be another new song somewhere down the rocky road ahead. Thanks, Lynn!

  13. Mike Powell says:

    I’m not yet to a point where I am taking pills for anything, but I can see that day coming in the near future as various body parts begin to function less well. Like so many others, I’d love to see these words set to a tune. I think the way that you get around the WordPress limitation for your plan is to post it on YouTube and then link to it in your posting.

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